Are we driven by money, fame, the search for beauty or love? I say those are all passengers, while the driver is the Why. Constantly we seek to know the Why in everything we do.
Studies say that 4-year olds ask about 200 to 300 questions a day, a lot of them starting with Why. Even if we lose this excessiveness of questioning while growing up, we still need the Why. It is the purpose, the drive and the changemaker of everything for us meaning-seeking creatures. Are you lifting a finger without a Why behind? No way!
Why is the bus late? Why is the sky dark at night? Why did you break my heart? Why am I who I am? Almost everything that happens in our life and thoughts comes with a pile of Whys. Whole books could be filled with questions starting with a Why. The Why is about exploring and discovering the meaning and purpose of things, and asking Why is a sign of curiosity, a symbol of not just taking things for granted. The wish to come to the ground of a deeper understanding.
The answers to those Whys determine our reactions and emotions, making the Why even more meaningful. Let me give you simple examples: A late bus might stir feelings of annoyance, but knowing that there was a terrible accident changes the emotions to consternation instantly. A cheating lover revealed he was at the hospital unconscious causes a different reaction than one who answers that he just felt attracted to somebody else. So the world often changes its turn just a tad when somebody’s lips spell a tiny little W-H-Y.
Acceptance is probably closer connected to understanding the Why than to Likeability. What we know we can easier accept, the Why brings the context. It reveals the considered angles that were the base for a decision. So open your lips and wisper Why, whenever you don’t understand, want to know more or feel tingling curiosity creeping up your spine.
Pictures: Marco Borromeo
